Learning the real meaning of "aloha"

With a move off the island imminent* we've started attacking our Hawaiian Bucket List with focus and determination. When we left California in 2008 after living there just a little over a year and a half we left full of regrets. We'd never had any reason to think we weren't staying there in California for the long haul so we hadn't felt rushed to explore and experience Northern California the way we could have. Consequently, we left realizing that we hadn't even visited some of the most obvious and amazing places in that part of the world.

So when we came to Hawaii we were determined to make the very most of this adventure and make sure that if we ever left we would do so with no regrets, with nothing left on our wish list of things to experience. As a result, we have experienced the islands like many, many locals never even experience. I've met people who've lived here their whole lives who've never been to Hanauma Bay, never visited the Arizona Memorial, never hiked Diamond Head. We've embraced the adventure of living here and taken part in as many Hawaiian experiences as we could. The happy result is that our original list of things that we wanted to be sure to do while here have been done! But of course we've added things to the list while living here and learning more of what the island has to offer. Our current Hawaiian Bucket List isn't actually very long. It consists of just a handful or so of things we haven't yet done but would like to do. And it also includes a few things we simply want to do one more time before leaving. Things that we've loved doing previously, places that hold special spots in our hearts. So we're packing our weekends with a few new adventures and revisiting some of our favorites. It's a very bittersweet time. But I LOVE that our Hawaiian Bucket List is mostly things we want to experience again. We've taken advantage of this place that we've called home for nearly 4 years. When we leave it will be with no regrets.

 Now in theory, the idea of redoing things that have been particularly special or important to us is a lovely idea. But when we started carefully planning our weekends to include each item on the list and then we actually started executing our plan I realized it was going to be brutally difficult to let go of this place. Ever since Willy lost his job in January I've known we'd be leaving the island, but I've been very selfishly in denial. When I truly think about leaving this place that has such a firm grip on my heart I weep. Every. Stupid. Time. My approach to dealing with the weepiness that results from thinking about the move is to... not think about the move. But we're running out of time, so I've had to think about it. And we've had to get serious about crossing things off our remaining list before we run out of time here.

So two weekends ago Willy and I took a trip to Waimea Valley to "hike" (aka walk up the lovely paved trail hehehe) through one of the most spectacular botanical gardens on the island for Willy to take pictures to his heart's content and for us to enjoy some time in the pool at the base of Waimea Falls. The first time I swam in the water below the waterfall I remember thinking "This is one of the most amazing things I've done in my entire life." The setting is spectacular. The waterfall is breathtaking and powerful. The experience is therapeutic and almost spiritual. I absolutely love Waimea Falls. It's one of my favorite places on the island. And somehow it became the first thing we crossed off our list of do-one-more-time experiences.

It also became the first place I had to say good-bye to.

We stayed in the 65 degree water much longer than we should have. We swam from one side of the waterfall to the other. We let the waterfall current push us across the pool of water and then we swam back to the base of the falls enough times that I lost count. We played together in the water and talked about how amazing the place was. We floated quietly and soaked in the experience. We postponed getting out of the water for as long as possible. But eventually it was time to leave.

As the sun dried and warmed me I studied my environment, trying to memorize the details. I didn't want to forget the beautiful cliff walls surrounding the water at the bottom of the Falls. I didn't want to forget the color of the rocks. I wanted to remember the greenery and vegetation of the valley. The temperature of the water. The slippery rocks under feet as you enter and exit the pool. The blue sky backdrop you see when you're floating on your back looking up at the Falls. I didn't want to forget a single thing.

But then it was time to go. And the most overwhelming feeling of love and appreciation for this place, one of God's most amazing creations, washed over me. How do you tell a location good-bye? How do you express to a place just how much you love, admire and appreciate it? "Aloha" means hello, good-bye and love. For the first time since moving here I think the full depth and meaning of the word reached my heart. I pressed my fingertips to my lips, blowing a kiss of sorts, while looking at the falls and whispered "Aloha".

And I wept. Because that's how I roll.

Waimea Falls, O'ahu, Hawaii

 

And a few of Willy's beautiful shots from the day. Is it any wonder that I'm emotional having to leave this amazing and gorgeous place?!

* Imminent move.... no formal job offer yet so no official relocation destination. But we're anxiously awaiting news from a company that has indicated that an offer is in the works. If the offer is right, we'll most likely be leaving at the end of June or very beginning of July. As bittersweet as it is to leave Hawaii, it will be a huge relief to get out of this limbo state of being that we're in right now and actually know where we're going next!

I Heart Faces May 2012 Photo Challenge

Doing my best to get in the groove of entering the I Heart Faces monthly photography challenge. This month's theme is "Hey Girl". You can't help but see a Ryan Gosling image in your head when you read that phrase, can you? I'll add a few of my fav "Hey Girl" images at the end of this post. In the meanwhile, here's the photo I'm submitting for the May 2012 I Heart Faces photo challenge. I took it a few weeks ago at Pyramid Rock Beach in Kaneohe. Molly was having a blast jumping the waves as they made their way up the beach. I love a well-captured action shot and this one simply made me smile, from the sand flying off her legs to her hair lifting off her head, this was a Molly moment I was so happy to catch through my lens!

This photo was submitted to the I Heart Faces photo challenge – www.iheartfaces.com

And here are a few of my fav "Hey Girl" Ryan Gosling images...

Too much to include in a FB status...

Today was way too busy to summarize in a FB status like I usually do at the end of an action packed Saturday, so I'm bringing the bullet point version of my day to the blog.

• I slept in. Willy went hiking. We each have our priorities, you know.
• Rode my bike to the store. Thoroughly enjoyed my mode of transportation.
• Met the kids at "Pride 4 Ewa" community carnival type event. Molly rode a pony. Boys climbed rock walls. Lots of bouncy house jumping and roundy-round ride riding. Got some of my money refunded when I raised a bit of a stink after waiting in line for 30+ minutes so Molly could ride the pony again, only to be told once we reached the front of the line that it was one ride per person. Would have been nice to have a sign or something indicating that... Refund appreciated - having to deal with a disappointed 4 year old? Not so appreciated. Still a fun morning in all. Rode our bikes home together.
• Grabbed the hula costumes and headed through terrible traffic to Waikiki where Molly and I performed at the Royal Hawaiian. Beautiful setting. I LOVE HULA.
• Got to finally experience Spam Jam! That's right folks... a whole festival devoted to a beloved favorite of the people of Hawaii... SPAM! I've wanted to attend since we got here so super glad we made it there this year. Some of the recipes being dished up by local food vendors sounded super yum - mango spam sliders, spam and pineapple pancakes, spicy spam quesadillas, etc. So what did I try? Spam Ice Cream popsicle. I kid you not. It was actually Brady's choice at the Ono Pops popsicle vendor, but he took one (chewy) bite and realized he'd made what he considered a terrible choice. So I let him have my Chocolate Apple Banana popsicle and I bravely took his Spam Ice Cream one. Vanilla ice cream? Good. Candied Spam? Good. Together? Meh. The combination was a little bizarre, but it was an experience!
• Dropped kids off at home with Little Caesar's and headed out for a date night dinner. Chose Outback because of a special deal they have going. Ate great food but left with a battle wound after somehow managing to break the entire top off the pepper grinder and slicing the palm of my hand open from the broken glass. Meal had to be replaced because of the potential of shards of glass having landed on my food (there were visible chunks of glass on the table.) Server brought me bandaids and first aid cream so I got to doctor myself at the table. Manager brought my replacement meal and wisely offered to grind the pepper for me. I apparently didn't know my own strength. Disappointed that they didn't at least comp my meal or something. Haven't they ever heard of frivolous lawsuits?  Sheesh. I'll have a sweet scar to remind me of my adventure in the Outback.

Another great day in Hawaii. Starting to feel a little (LOT) anxious about the dwindling number of Saturdays we have left here. No concrete plans yet (in other words no official moving destination yet) but pretty certain we'll be leaving by mid-July. Sigh. We're making the most of the time we've got here though, for sure!

Okay. I had to come back and add pics since Willy pulled them off the card :) There are some fun ones from today!!

Roundy-round ride. Boys LOVED it.

Molly? Not so much...

She did love the pony ride though!!

Ben made it to the top!

Brady made it to the top!

Toby made it to the top

Molly's class! She loves being front and center. Unfortunately that didn't
put her in a great spot for pics this time. And Willy and the boys got stuck in
wicked traffic on the way to Waikiki so they missed her first performance.

Yay! Love this pic Willy got of me :)

If all goes well, this will be the last time I dance in my "tent" dress. We're getting sassy new dresses for our end-of-year show and the seamstress has agreed to fit me for mine and make it just one week before the show so I can wear it fitting right since I absolutely intend to continue losing weight and want to feel GREAT in my costume! :)

This is my fav move in the dance Ipo Lei Momi.
So glad Willy captured it!
In it I'm... smoothing the bedsheets... hehehe.
This is from our "naughty" hula dance.

This one is Willy's fav move though. I may or may
not be... ahem... referencing a certain body part. *blush*

Had to snap a shot of me and Molly after the show before we hit  Spam Jam :)

Spam Jam!!

Spam, spam, spam, spam, spammity spam! 

See those Spam Jam '12 special flavors?

This would be me eating one of those special flavors:
"Candied Spam Ice Cream". 

I almost forgot the funniest part of the day! Ben won sneak preview
screening tickets to a movie because he was wearing the biggest
slippers out of all the men in the crowd LOL.
(They were clearly killing time and coming up with some
crazy contests while waiting for next performers to be ready to roll LOL)

Okay, now this entry is actually done. I don't think anyone wants to see pics of my Outback adventure wound, so I'll wrap this up LOL.

The once a month blog entry (in three parts)...

Apparently I still stink at keeping up the family blog. I try. I swear I try. But it manages to get bumped down the priority list and *bam* another whole month has gone by with no updates. March was a busy busy month and I've got a load of pictures to show for it. So this will be a photo blog kind of update. And as I was prepping pics for this post it quickly became apparent that I was going to have to cover the month of activity in multiple posts. So I'll try to do one a day for three days and get caught up! So without further ado...


March - PART 1


Willy and I took a wonderful little trip up to Laie early in March to go to the LDS Temple with members of our ward (church congregation). It was a special day because one of the young men in our ward was getting ready to go on a mission and we were there to support him as he prepared to go. Also our ward had a special training meeting of sorts with the temple president while we were there and had the chance to learn from him and ask questions and it was just a really beautiful day. Willy took some beautiful before-sunrise pictures of the temple and then I took him to see a spot on the island that he hadn't seen yet - Laie Point. It was a really beautiful, spiritual day!

We had an amazingly huge amount of rain this winter. We had some great lightning storms, some incredible downpour rainstorms. Willy loved the lightning and woke me up one morning at about 5 a.m. because the most amazing lightning storm was taking place! It was unlike anything I'd ever seen before. He got some awesome video of it! 

And the kids took advantage of the rain and mom's good mood and got to throw swimsuits on and go play in the rain one afternoon. I loved that Molly put on her lifejacket for safety!

I'm pretty sure Brady was doing the Chicken Dance
at this point...

Willy started his new job the second week of March. It was bittersweet, of course. Excellent to have him gainfully employed again, but sad to send him out the door in the morning and not have him with us at home for the day any more. He seems to be enjoying his job, although it's a little awkward knowing that it's most likely just a temporary gig. Hard to know how to approach making friends with co-workers if you're not going to be there very long, hard to plan on big future projects when you know you won't likely be there to see them through to completion, etc. But he seems to like the environment and he seems to like the work, and of course we're grateful for steady income again and the opportunity to stay at least a few more months so that the kids can finish the school year and enjoy that consistency before whatever big changes are in store come our way.

At the end of his first week back to work we were in need of a BIG family day. So Willy took us to a beautiful spot on the island that he had discovered when hiking with one of his friends. We hiked through a beautiful bamboo forest and visited the ruins of Kamehameha III's summer palace. SUPER cool place! Gorgeous ruins.

I'm in love with this pic of Molly. Way to bomb the
otherwise perfect shot, girl!! Way. To. Go.

How gorgeous is that?!

Bamboo sticks make great swords

Could have been a nearly perfect family photo! But the camera had something
going on with the mirror inside and the result as a very smudgy, cloudy shot. Boooo!

We took a whole bunch of pics and even passed the camera off to Brady
to get shots of Willy and I :)

Willy played with funky settings on his camera and managed to get some fun
shots of the kids and I (despite the smudge issue.)

Molly has mad cross-eyed skillz!

After the ruins, Willy led the way to a beautiful little waterfall.

 Our adventures from that day aren't even over yet, but goodness... this is a lot of pictures. I think I'll break that family fun day up and share the rest of the pics tomorrow. It's time to do some dishes and get ready for hula class. Happy Tuesday evening!

I Heart Faces Photo Challenge

Willy has been really encouraging and supportive of my desire to improve my portrait photography. I'm pretty sure he has some ulterior motives and he's hoping that I'll catch the same addicted-to-new-lenses-bug that he has so that I'll be more supportive when he finds a new camera toy or accessory that he wants to get his hands on. Whatever the reason though, I love the support and encouragement!

So in an effort to focus a bit more on my photography skills and put into practice the things I've been learning, I'm going to start entering the photography contest on I Heart Faces. I've been receiving their email for quite a while and love seeing the photos included in the contest. It can't hurt me to enter my photos, right? Right. So this month's theme is "Happiness" and this will be my first entry in an I Heart Faces contest!

Happiness is Mom letting you put your swimsuit on so you can go outside and play in the spring rain.

This photo was submitted to the I Heart Faces photo challenge – www.iheartfaces.com

Employment!

It's been almost a month since I updated my blog. We've been in such a holding pattern that it's been hard to get enthusiastic about blogging "still looking". We have news though, so it's time for an update!

A couple weeks ago Willy had a really good interview with a local company that he hoped to work for. We waited... and waited... and waited for word on the results of the interview. Willy's contact with the company kept him in the loop in a sense, dropping him emails and letting him know they were interested in him but still reviewing all received resumes (mandatory because it was for work on a government project), trying to work out budget and billing issues for the position they wanted to hire Willy for, etc. So we waited but not entirely blindly. We started to get our hopes up. It seemed pretty apparent that they were trying to keep Willy positive and excited about the job even though their hands were a little tied and unable to just offer him the position immediately. Finally on Friday afternoon Willy got the call letting him know they'd like him to come in early this week so they could make him an official offer! Then we got all sorts of excited! And relief sort of washed over us.

So Tuesday he went in and was offered the job. Unfortunately the salary offer was almost a 25% decrease in pay compared to Willy's last job. Because of the nature of the job and the fact that it's a government project there's an absolute maximum cap on the amount that can be paid for the work, and that's the amount the company is offering Willy.  The company wasn't trying to low-ball him or instigate some negotiations or anything.  In fact they're doing everything possible to entice Willy to work for them including lots of discussions about future opportunity possibilities that would have a higher pay rate, etc. But there's no established time frame for any of those opportunities.

We can't support our family on possible opportunities.

So at this point it's feeling pretty apparent that it's time for us to move on. People don't always understand how expensive it is to live here in Hawaii. Nearly all of our foods and general supplies are imported which means our grocery bills are pretty astronomical. Housing is outrageously priced for small homes with little or no yard. It's consistently one of the most expensive places to buy gas. Electricity costs are out of control and climbing. Add to that the fact that we've chosen to keep me home with the kids and not out working a full time job, and that puts a lot of burden squarely on Willy's shoulders. A lot of households here in Hawaii have multiple income earners, and I'm not just talking about a mom and dad who both work outside the home. A lot of time there are adult children living with their parents, aunties or uncles living with family members, grandparents living with family, etc. And they all work or earn income. And all the income is necessary to keep a household afloat, because despite the cost of living, pay rates here aren't necessarily that much better than elsewhere in the country. I could return to work full-time, but we still have Molly at home and would have to pay for childcare and me being away from home simply isn't what we feel is best for our family.

So all of that just to say that the offer the company made Willy simply won't be enough in the long run to keep us here. It feels a bit like putting a bandaid on a wound that really needs stitches. We feel confident that with the job, we'll be able to stay afloat until the school year is out so the kids can finish up and not be displaced mid-year. But unless some of those potential opportunities the company suggested start actually happening, we won't be able to stay beyond July-ish. And of course if we're relocating we want to do it before the next school year starts, so mid/end July is a perfect time to move.

If there's ever a perfect time to move away from Hawaii.

So Willy is taking the job and will probably be starting in the next 2 weeks (this is a new project and new position so they have to get his office space prepared with new computer, etc). And we're SO grateful for employment. And honestly we're grateful for the offer Willy was made because it helped us make our decision to start aggressively pursuing employment on the mainland. It helped us realize that it's most likely time for our family to move on to the next adventure. The offer was just low enough for us to know we can't cut enough corners to make that salary work permanently, but just high enough to tide us over till summer time which gives us time to prepare for the move. (Moving across the ocean is no small feat...) And the company understands that what they're offering isn't adequate for long term and they know he'll be searching mainland jobs and most likely be leaving them sooner than they'd hope but they still want him for as long as they can have him, which just adds to how proud of my husband I am. He's got the skills companies need. I know the right job is out there for him and now we can be willing to look for it even though it means relocating.

So! Willy is on the Linked In network and all of his resume and experience information is listed there. (HERE is the link to his profile.) Feel free to try to sell us on your corner of the world hehehe. We're open to just about anywhere at this point as long as the job is right to provide for our family. Feel free to pass his info along!

It's probably about time for an update, right?

Figured the suspense of waiting to hear if Willy had a new job or not would be almost exciting for you as it is for us. Which is, y'know, not really exciting at all. But the update? We're surviving!

It's been nearly a month since Willy was laid off and it took about 3 weeks for the first unemployment check to finally arrive in our mailbox so those first three weeks were pretty frightening and nerve-wracking as we watched our bank account having stuff going out but nothing coming back in. But now that we even have that fraction of Willy's previous income arriving weekly in our mailbox we feel like we can stay afloat. That and the generosity of friends who've treated us to an evening out for sweet treats, friends who invited our family over for dinner one Sunday night, a friend who bought goggles for my boys so their eyes wouldn't have to suffer from the over-chlorination of the pool where they're taking swim lessons (yay for free Parks & Recs programs!!), a dance teacher who generously offered to allow Brady to continue coming to class but froze our account so we wouldn't have to make payments for now, a church welfare program unmatched by any that I've ever heard of that is keeping food on our table, and above all else? A massive amount of praying going on! We feel so supported and comforted because of all the prayers our family and friends are offering on our behalf. Despite the stress that you can imagine, we mostly feel very well looked-after and cared for and we know that Heavenly Father is aware of our needs and is blessing us.

Willy has impressed a lot of people over the years and has done some great networking at various industry events and through work in general. He's got contacts all over the country and has felt a lot of support from his colleagues. While we haven't aggressively sought employment on the mainland yet, Willy has been blessed through his contacts with a few bits of freelance type work and has some potential short-term contract work coming up as well. 

He also has one very solid potential employment opportunity here locally that we're hoping to hear more about in the next couple of weeks. The position they're hiring for is a new one at the company and because a major part of their work is a large government project they have a lot of hoops to jump through before they can offer anyone the job. So the interviewing and hiring process is a little slow going and there's still a bit of unknown as far as whether the job would provide an income adequate for our family here in Hawaii, but we're pretty confident that because Willy is the perfectly matched candidate for the position there's a very real chance an offer will be made in the next couple of weeks. If that opportunity doesn't become a reality Willy will start aggressively seeking employment on the mainland, and any decisions we have will be approached with a lot of prayer because we know Heavenly Father has a plan for us, whether it's for us to stay put at least a while longer or for us to move on to the next adventure.

I have a lot of mixed feelings about the idea of leaving Hawaii. I'm sure it's clear that I've pretty much given Hawaii my heart. I feel like after those first few months of adjusting to life in the islands, the islands got inside me and have just become a part of who I am. I know I was meant to be here, at least for this short time (if not longer). I don't want to leave Hawaii and each time I think about it too seriously I get pretty emotional. When I imagine flying away from the islands with a one-way ticket it makes me want to just curl up and cry. BUT! I've had moments of imagining what new adventures might lie in store for our family and I've felt peaceful and even a bit excited about experiencing something entirely new to us in a new location. The only thing I've told Willy is that if we have to leave Hawaii I want it to be with a destination full of new exciting experiences for us. A place that will feel sort of adventurous the way coming to Hawaii felt for us when we came here. 

We're trying hard to just keep some semblance of normalcy during this crazy time. The kids are all in school, Brady and Toby just started swim lessons again through the Parks & Rec department and Molly and I started back up in the Parents & Tots program (also through Parks & Rec). Molly and I continue to dance hula. Willy is still making his bike riding a priority despite not doing it to commute right now. He even just did the killer 40+ mile ride from Laie to home in Ewa Beach after we went to the temple last week. He's a machine :)

In addition to the routine things we've had a few fun diversions and experiences in the last few weeks. I turned 39 on the 12th of January and have been diligently working on my fitness and health as I start what will surely be a speedy year as I approach 40 (gulp). I participated in my first official 5K experience (which was technically a 5+ K since they had to reroute us slightly due to construction so it was about 1/2 mile longer than normal LOL). It was on the Marine Corps Base in Kaneohe and was called "King of the Hill" due to the humongous radar hill we had to climb in the middle of the race. It was an amazing experience (I blogged about it HERE on my weight loss blog and would love for you to read about it if you haven't already) and I'm getting really excited for my February race experience which will be the Great Aloha Run (thanks to my amazing friend Michelle for encouraging me to run a race with her each month and another amazing friend Kristi who "sponsored" me and paid my race entrance fee!!!). I'm also hosting a fun weight loss competition on my weight loss blog which is proving to be an AWESOME experience! It's keeping me busy, for sure!

Willy and I took a lovely morning trip to Hanauma Bay during his "time off" and as a family we've had considerably more time to spend together. Most of the time that's a great thing hehehe. Like today? Today we skateboarded, biked and played together after school as an entire family for a good while. It was awesome. 

Life in general? Pretty darn awesome. 

So we're surviving! And even thriving in some aspects. It will be a HUGE relief to have a consistent income again of course and we're hopeful that that will arrive sooner than later, but our update at this point is that life is absolutely a-okay. We're a-okay. We're being watched over and protected and we feel the prayers of love and support. We're hopeful that we'll have good news to share on the job front in the near future. Thank you for continuing to pray for us! It means more to us than I can express in words! Mahalo!